This website, the Facebook page and the other corresponding media were created as part of a research project. My focus is mainly women although I understand there are men who also wish to remain childfree and welcome them to participate.
The reason I chose to focus on childfree women is because of the challenges we face continuously for making this decision. As women, society has placed an expectation on us to “utilize” our fertility and reproduce because of course, women should naturally want to be mothers. Often times when we make the childfree choice, no matter what the reason, we are made to feel like we aren’t “real” women. We experience these things from all facets of our world. Friends, family, strangers, media, religion, education, business establishments, for the most part society as a whole. All of them expect that the culmination of a woman’s life is when she becomes a mother. I know this is not true and I know I am not alone. There are many women on this earth currently and those who have been here before us that have accomplished things people could not begin to imagine and yet, they never had children. Using reproductive functions to gauge the worth of a woman (or man as the case may be) is wrong and outdated thinking. We are all so much more than that.
People without children are often not looked at as having “real” families. As families continue to evolve and the word is being redefined, we have to realize by now that families are what we make them. Simply having a woman, a man and a child or multiple children living in the same house does not make a family. For some, family of any kind is not important, for others it means everything. Whether that family includes a biological child should be something that we as individuals should be deciding for ourselves, not society, politics, religion or any other facet of external thought. My immediate family consists of my husband, myself, a fish and our seven cats. To me, it is perfect. Although, should some other homeless fur baby in need of love, care and a home find its way to my door then there is the possibility my family could expand and it would just be even more perfect. I also have dear friends I consider family and since you can’t predict when a needy fur baby will show up on your doorstep or a new dear friend will make an appearance, there is always the chance my family will expand. But I can say with certainty that it will never expand as a result of me giving birth and I and others who feel the same way should not be judged because of this. NOT HAVING CHILDREN IS A VALID OPTION.
While doing my research, I wanted to create a safe, judgement free community where people of like minds could share ideas, thoughts, frustrations or triumphs. I hope it makes for a space, even if it is a small one, that allows people to feel like they belong and are free to express themselves.